11. Crotch Rot
That dank smelling, paint peeling, dirty reaking, crotch scratching extravaganza that happens due to poor hygiene of the groin. Commonly confused with the less-serious crotch chaffing.
In Austrian folklore, this mythical creature accompanies Santa during the Christmas season. However, he's far from a typical "Santa's Little Helper". This demon-esque Krampus, is a cross between a really pissed-off Grinch, and an Orc from Lord of the Rings. His main task is to frighten bad children into becoming good, by threatening to beat them with long birch whips and rusty chains. Oh, and there's his promise of dragging you to the pits of hell with him as well. Almost makes getting coal in your stocking seem like a good thing. See also Holidays.
"Oh yeah your sister and I had a good time, if you know what I mean."
14. Shake Weight Shop
It's possibly the funniest/sexiest workout gimmick of all time. So while being pointed horizontally at chest height, this vibrating 20 lb contraption shakes and rumbles in the hands of the user, and claims to be useful for toning women's arms. (Not to direct you away from Inherently Funny or anything, but seriously just go look it up on YouTube. It's that good.) See also Sex, Women.
"I'll race you to the tree and back! On three...? one... two..." Winning isn't everything... it's the only thing.
Anything worth having is a thing worth cheating for.... right? See also Games.
19. Bird Shots
Just picture how a mother bird feeds it's chicks, then you're starting to get the idea. Works best after you've had a couple too many. See also Alcohol.
So, who's in for some Flaming Sambuca on their fingers? See also Alcohol.