Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

1. "No matter what button I push there's still a big eleven on the screen."

To which I replied, "Thats the 'pause' Mom." See also Technology.

Added by lanza130 on December 10, 2016| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

2. "Why don't you go back to your home on Whore Island?"

Asked Ron Burgundy.

Added by lanza130 on December 10, 2016| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

3. "You're Mean!" "No I'm Not. I'm Dad."

I mean, come on. See also Dads.

Added by Athena on October 15, 2016| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

4. "Nah."

-Rosa Parks, 1955 See also History.

Added by a Guest on August 16, 2016| 5 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

5. My Grandparents Didn't Come All the Way from Germany to See This Country Overrun by Immigrants!

Might want to rethink that one, Donald Trump. See also Hypocritical, Politics.

Added by a Guest on May 14, 2016| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Dude. Do us a solid. Add your own funny quote.

Funny Quotes

7. "Donald Trump may be a rat but I have no desire to copulate with him."

Keep it classy, Ted Cruz. See also Politics, Rodents, Sex.

Added by Anthony on March 26, 2016| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

8. "Time Flies Like an Arrow. Fruit Flies Like a Banana."

Groucho Marx said this.

Added by a Guest on February 9, 2016| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

9. "Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad."

Attributed to British journalist Miles Kington. See also Fruits.

Added by Matthew on October 21, 2015| 7 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

10. "My cat's breath smells like cat food."

So sayeth Ralph Wiggum. See also Cats.

Added by a Guest on October 2, 2015| 2 Comments | You Like This |

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