1. Are You Just Saying That to Shut Me Up?
Uniquely painful, people seeing right through you; because, OF COURSE that's why you're feigning compassion.
2. Please Do Me the Courtesy of Your Absence
Credited to Lenin. Funny, nonetheless. See also Communism.
3. Anti-Social Mood Disorder
Um, "being a jerk," right? See also Antisocial.
In Minnesota, when something just goes down the drain... Aw, Jeeze. Said from high to low pitch, with "ee" as in "cheese." See also Minnesota.
5. Dick Assman
Not made up.
Bits of poo still stuck to an animal's butt fur. Butt fur. See also Scatological.
7. Pull a Boner
To make a big mistake, a social faux pas, to err.
What happens to guys in prison.
9. Guy About to Get Kicked in the Nuts
When some guy tries to get in my grill, maybe calling me a stupid name. This is what I call him. Quietly.
10. Frightened, White, Middle-Class Old People
Bulletin: You're getting govt. health care now. Oh, and MedicAid. And disability benefits. All of it, every penny, financed by me. Money I could really use. Another thing, while ranting, fascist or communist? Make up your minds. See also Elderly.