Funny Sayings

1. Children Are Like Farts

Your own are just about bearable, but everyone else’s are horrendous. See also Children, Flatulence.

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Funny Sayings

2. I Scream, You Scream, the Police Come, It’s Awkward

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Funny Sayings

3. You’re Welkie

For when you don’t have time to say the full word. See also Cringe.

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Funny Sayings

4. Your Bad Luck Has Probably Saved You From Worse Luck

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Funny Sayings

5. Good Things Take Time, and That’s Why I’m Always Late

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Funny Sayings

6. You Can’t Fold Soup, But You Can Try

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Funny Sayings

7. “My Bad” and “Sorry” Mean the Same Thing Unless You’re at a Funeral

See also Death.

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Funny Sayings

8. I Like to Put My Oranges in the Refrigerator, then Close the Door and Open It Back Up Again to Play a Sad, Sadistic Version of Peek-a-Boo

A saying some friends and I used back in school when fooling around with Google Translate.

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Funny Sayings

9. A thief broke into my house and stole all my lamps. I should be angry, but I am de-lighted.

See also Dad Jokes.

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Funny Sayings

10. If you run in front of a car you get tired. If you run behind a car you get exhausted.

Dad jokes to tell you dad. See also Dad Jokes.

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