Funny Sayings

31. If you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for one day. If you teach a man to fish, you’ll have the house to yourself.

The surest way to avoid divorce. See also Fishing, Marriage.

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Funny Sayings

32. The World Would be a Better Place Without Me, Which is Why I Must Keep Living

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Funny Sayings

33. You Bet Your Bottom Dollar!

See also Old-Timey.

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Funny Sayings

34. I Before E Except After C

Eight, neighbor, eighty, weight, vein, veil. I ❤️ English. See also Grammar.

Added by a Guest on March 25, 2023| 14 Comments | 24 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

35. The asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs was technically the highest ratio of killing birds to one stone in history.

Massive killstreak. See also Dinosaurs.

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Funny Sayings

36. The bad news is that I dropped my 5-foot cactus.

The worse news is that I caught it.

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Funny Sayings

37. Quidquid Latine Dictum Sit Altum Videtur

Latin for, “Whatever is said in Latin sounds profound.” See also Latin.

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Funny Sayings

38. If it Doesn’t Fit in Your Mouth, You’re Not Trying Hard Enough

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Funny Sayings

39. A Computer Once Beat Me at Chess, but It Was No Match for Me at Kickboxing

See also Technology, Violence.

Added by Yeetaleetthesecond on November 17, 2022| 1 Comment | 44 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

40. Alcohol, Because No Great Story Started from Eating a Salad

See also Alcohol.

Added by Yeetaleetthesecond on November 17, 2022| 1 Comment | 36 people like this You Like This | Unlike