Funny Sayings

31. I Pooped My Pants and All I Got Was This Lousy Poop in My Pants

See also Pants, Scatological.

Added by a Guest on May 29, 2023| 4 Comments | 28 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

32. Cats These Days…

My cat peed on me. 😕 See also Cats.

Added by KitKat66 on May 23, 2023| 8 Comments | 16 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

33. If you give a man a fish, he’ll eat for one day. If you teach a man to fish, you’ll have the house to yourself.

The surest way to avoid divorce. See also Fishing, Marriage.

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Funny Sayings

34. The World Would be a Better Place Without Me, Which is Why I Must Keep Living

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Funny Sayings

35. You Bet Your Bottom Dollar!

See also Old-Timey.

Added by a Guest on April 13, 2023| 1 Comment | 11 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

36. I Before E Except After C

Eight, neighbor, eighty, weight, vein, veil. I ❤️ English. See also Grammar.

Added by a Guest on March 25, 2023| 14 Comments | 25 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

37. The asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs was technically the highest ratio of killing birds to one stone in history.

Massive killstreak. See also Dinosaurs.

Added by Vector on February 26, 2023| 5 Comments | 90 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

38. The bad news is that I dropped my 5-foot cactus.

The worse news is that I caught it.

Added by a Guest on January 23, 2023| 3 Comments | 40 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

39. Quidquid Latine Dictum Sit Altum Videtur

Latin for, “Whatever is said in Latin sounds profound.” See also Latin.

Added by a Guest on January 6, 2023| 4 Comments | 43 people like this You Like This | Unlike

Funny Sayings

40. If it Doesn’t Fit in Your Mouth, You’re Not Trying Hard Enough

Added by Phantom01 on December 7, 2022| 7 Comments | 42 people like this You Like This | Unlike