Funny Insults

1. You Look Like Little Birds Help You Get Dressed in the Morning

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Funny Things to Do

2. Leaning All Your Weight on a Shopping Cart and Gliding Through the Frozen Food Aisle Like a Professional Figure Skater

I am speed and grace.

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Funny Things to Do

3. Navigating Your Dark House at 3AM Using Only Your Bat-like Sonar and the Tiny Light from the Microwave

Mission impossible.

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Funny Euphemisms

4. Lung Food

Also known as air.

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Funny Names

5. Dick Bong

American flying ace from WWII. See also Sophomoric.

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Funny Sayings

6. “My Bad” and “Sorry” Mean the Same Thing Unless You’re at a Funeral

See also Death.

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Funny Anti-Jokes

7. My Grief Counsellor Died Yesterday, and He’s So Good, I Don’t Even Care

See also Death, Therapy.

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Funny Questions

8. Why Did the Old Man Fall Down the Well?

Because he didn’t see that well.

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Funny Things to Do

9. Catching Ghosts Outside

Even spirits need to touch grass. See also Ghosts.

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Funny Euphemisms

10. The Floor is Lava, But Sad

Also known as Monday morning.

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