Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

1. "I Tried Taking the Shell off of a Snail in the Hopes of It Being Faster..."

But it just ended up being more sluggish. -Hank Green

Added by twerg45 on March 26, 2018| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

2. "I'm on a Rock."

Said every kid playing lava floor ever.

Added by a Guest on March 19, 2018| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

3. "You Can’t Just Let Nature Run Wild."

-Walter J. Hickel, who was governor of Alaska, United States secretary of the interior, and then governor again

Added by a Guest on March 9, 2018| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

4. Dan

-This quote is the wrong way round.

Added by a Guest on December 16, 2017| 4 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

5. "No, I have a forcefield!"

So says your annoying childhood friend, every time you played pretend shooting games. Worth trying at work, though. See also Annoying, Children.

Added by a Guest on November 17, 2017| Comment | You Like This |

Dude. Do us a solid. Add your own funny quote.

Funny Quotes

6. "Never Wear Anything That Panics the Cat."

- P.J. O'Rourke See also Cats.

Added by a Guest on October 10, 2017| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

7. "I think gay marriage should be between a man and a woman."

Arnold Schwarzenegger in 2003. See also Politics.

Added by a Guest on August 7, 2017| 4 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

8. "Be Nice to Nerds. Chances Are, You'll End Up Working for One."

- Bill Gates See also Nerds.

Added by a Guest on June 20, 2017| 5 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

9. "Wrong."

- The President of the United States See also Politics.

Added by ssjwesker on May 19, 2017| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

10. "Luke, I am your father."

Actually, everyone has it wrong. It's actually, "No, I am your father." See also Misquotes, Star Wars.

Added by a Guest on March 29, 2017| 4 Comments | You Like This |

Top Contributors of Funny Quotes

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.