Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

31. “If you are allergic to a thing, it is best not to put that thing in your mouth, particularly if the thing is cats.”

―Lemony Snicket See also Cats.

Added by That1dumass on November 11, 2022| 5 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

32. “It is only when mosquito land on your testicles that you realize there is a way to solve problems without using violence.”

―Unknown See also Violence.

Added by a Guest on October 10, 2022| 4 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

33. “If rum can’t fix it, you’re not using enough rum.”

―Captain Jack Sparrow See also Alcohol, Pirates.

Added by a Guest on October 4, 2022| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

34. “No.”

―My Mum See also Parents.

Added by a Guest on August 16, 2022| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

35. “The sweet smell of spilled electric guts. The sparking diodes… I freaking live for this!”

―The Toaster See also Appliances.

Added by a Guest on March 9, 2022| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Kind sir, might you lend a hand and add a funny quote?

Funny Quotes

36. “All Toasters Toast Toast!“

―Mario in Hotel Mario See also Video Games.

Added by Yeetaleetthesecond on February 2, 2022| 7 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

37. “Please don’t waste your life on useless websites.”

―Mom

Added by a Guest on February 2, 2022| 16 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

38. “If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.”

Thanks for the advice, Clint Eastwood. See also Appliances.

Added by Yeetaleetthesecond on January 28, 2022| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

39. “Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a deserted island, what book I’d bring… ‘How to Build a Boat.’”

―Steven Wright See also Boats, Islands.

Added by Yeetaleetthesecond on January 28, 2022| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

40. “Be Strong.”

―Me to My Wi-Fi Router See also Internet, Technology.

Added by Yeetaleetthesecond on January 19, 2022| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Top Contributors of Funny Quotes

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.