Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

71. “I will wait forever… if you’re not too long.”

Thank you, Oscar Wilde.

Added by MsKnowItAll on January 6, 2021| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

72. “The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”

―Douglas Adams in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

Added by a Guest on December 9, 2020| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

73. “I can’t fit the orange in the pencil sharpener, Mom.”

Something I once said while sleepwalking.

Added by a Guest on October 9, 2020| 14 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

74. “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”

―Steve Martin

Added by a Guest on August 29, 2020| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

75. “Peoples say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every say.”

―A. A. Milne

Added by a Guest on August 23, 2020| 9 Comments | You Like This |

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Funny Quotes

76. “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”

―The Dalai Lama

Added by a Guest on August 12, 2020| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

77. "Humans Are Just Animals with Guns."

―My Dad See also Fathers, Guns.

Added by a Guest on May 30, 2020| 4 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

78. "I'm not a pee wizard. I can't predict pee."

Me, when my girlfriend complained that she needed to go to the bathroom right after I called her. See also Bathroom, Magic.

Added by a Guest on May 3, 2020| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

79. "FIRE BAD!"

―Frankenstien's Monster See also Monsters.

Added by a Guest on April 27, 2020| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

80. "If you can't be content with what you have received, be thankful for what you have escaped."

―Izaak Walton

Added by a Guest on April 10, 2020| 2 Comments | You Like This |

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