Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

61. “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”

―Steve Martin

Added by a Guest on August 29, 2020| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

62. “Peoples say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every say.”

―A. A. Milne

Added by a Guest on August 23, 2020| 9 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

63. “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”

―The Dalai Lama

Added by a Guest on August 12, 2020| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

64. "Humans Are Just Animals with Guns."

―My Dad See also Fathers, Guns.

Added by a Guest on May 30, 2020| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

65. "I'm not a pee wizard. I can't predict pee."

Me, when my girlfriend complained that she needed to go to the bathroom right after I called her. See also Bathroom, Magic.

Added by a Guest on May 3, 2020| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Kind sir, might you lend a hand and add a funny quote?

Funny Quotes

66. "FIRE BAD!"

―Frankenstien's Monster See also Monsters.

Added by a Guest on April 27, 2020| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

67. "If you can't be content with what you have received, be thankful for what you have escaped."

―Izaak Walton

Added by a Guest on April 10, 2020| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

68. "In painting, you have unlimited power. You have the ability to move mountains. You can bend rivers. But when i get home the only thing i have power over is the garbage."

―Bob Ross See also Art, Celebrities.

Added by a Guest on March 27, 2020| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

69. "If I was a sloth, I would invent a sloth-sized car pretty quickly."

Deep. See also Sloths.

Added by a Guest on March 19, 2020| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

70. "Tu manges un grande sandwich."

―My Brother
French for "You are eating a big sandwich."
See also French, Sandwiches.

Added by a Guest on March 15, 2020| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Top Contributors of Funny Quotes

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.