Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

121. "Donald Trump may be a rat but I have no desire to copulate with him."

Keep it classy, Ted Cruz. See also Politics, Rodents, Sex.

Added by Anthony on March 26, 2016| 5 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

122. "Time Flies Like an Arrow. Fruit Flies Like a Banana."

Groucho Marx said this.

Added by a Guest on February 9, 2016| 10 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

123. "Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad."

Attributed to British journalist Miles Kington. See also Fruits.

Added by Matthew on October 21, 2015| 16 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

124. "My cat's breath smells like cat food."

So sayeth Ralph Wiggum. See also Cats.

Added by a Guest on October 2, 2015| 5 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

125. "You, all right?! I learned it by watching you!"

Any one from the 80's will get this. Its the anti-drug PSA. See also 80's, Drugs.

Added by HaloPrincess2642 on September 26, 2015| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Dude. Do us a solid. Add your own funny quote.

Funny Quotes

126. "Though she be but little, she is fierce!"

Shakespeare in A Midsummer Night's Dream. See also Literature, Shakespeare.

Added by a Guest on September 26, 2015| 4 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

127. "Smoking Kills. If You're Killed, You've Lost a Very Important Part of Your Life"

Brooke Shields may or may not have said this. See also Celebrities, Smoking.

Added by a Guest on September 17, 2015| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

128. "Villain, I Have Done Thy Mother."

From Shakespeare's Titus Andronicus, the original Yo Mama joke. See also Shakespeare.

Added by a Guest on August 2, 2015| 5 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

129. "Whatever."

-The Teenager

Added by a Guest on June 27, 2015| 10 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

130. "I've found that if you put the name of some dead philosopher at the end of a quote, people will believe it."

-Plato
See also Philosophy.

Added by a Guest on June 26, 2015| 13 Comments | You Like This |

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