Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes

141. "I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party."

From comedian Ron White.

Added by aman1261 on April 14, 2014| 7 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

142. "Just because a page on the internet has a famous person's name after a quote, it doesn't mean he or she said it."

-Abraham Lincoln

Added by a Guest on March 24, 2014| 19 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

143. "Text Me the Deets"

How teens talk on network TV. See also Slang, Teenagers, Television.

Added by Anthony on December 21, 2013| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

144. "I'm Cold." "Hi Cold, I'm Dad."

Classic dad humor. See also Dads.

Added by a Guest on December 18, 2013| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

145. "One always tends to overpraise a long book because one has got through it."

It wasn't by me, E. M. Forster said it. See also Literature.

Added by captain on February 17, 2013| 3 Comments | You Like This |

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Funny Quotes

146. "A Ghost Haunts My Bowels."

And it's not afraid to announce itself. See also Flatulence.

Added by Anthony on November 6, 2011| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

147. "Miss Jackson, if you're nasty."

See also 80's, Music.

Added by tammyred on May 1, 2011| 9 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

148. "In the Case of 2-Year-Old Alex, You Are the Father."

Maury Povich reading the paternity test results. See also Television.

Added by a Guest on April 14, 2010| 3 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

149. "I'll Get You My Pretty, and Your Little Dog Too"

From Wizard of Oz. See also Dogs.

Added by tommy22 on March 17, 2010| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Quotes

150. "Taste My Sherry and Biscuits."

Best line from Alexandre Dumas' The Count of Monte Cristo. Insulting if used in the right context. "Oh yeah? Well I suggest you taste my sherry and biscuits!" See also Food, French, Literature.

Added by mellojello on March 6, 2010| Comment | You Like This |

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