Tim's Entries

Funny Euphemisms

11. Butt-raped

What happens to guys in prison.

Added by Tim on November 5, 2009| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Nicknames

12. Guy About to Get Kicked in the Nuts

When some guy tries to get in my grill, maybe calling me a stupid name. This is what I call him. Quietly.

Added by Tim on September 20, 2009| 7 Comments | You Like This |

Funny People

13. Frightened, White, Middle-Class Old People

Bulletin: You're getting govt. health care now. Oh, and MedicAid. And disability benefits. All of it, every penny, financed by me. Money I could really use. Another thing, while ranting, fascist or communist? Make up your minds. See also Elderly.

Added by Tim on September 15, 2009| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Things

14. Saw Paintings

Very big in Wisconsin. These are paintings, usually of nature scenes, done on the side of a hand saw in oil paint. See also Art, Wisconsin.

Added by Tim on September 15, 2009| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Things

15. 1970's Metal Lunchboxes With a Glass-Lined Thermos

For children. Inside a metal lunch box. Didn't matter if it was Barbie, Hong Kong Fooey, or Hot Wheels; the Thermos bottle had a glass lining. The lining would last approximately two days, if it didn't in fact break on the way to school. I remember actually pursing my lips and actually drinking my milk through the glass. It took the lunchbox people around eight years or so figure out that it was a bad idea. See also 70's, Children, Schools.

Added by Tim on August 20, 2009| 2 Comments | You Like This |

Funny Things to Do

16. Getting a Red-hot Pot Seed Down Your Shirt

...and you can't get it out. So you jump up, slap and push on your chest and stomach, swear like a sailor, and then sort of finally lean forward and shake your shirt. Riotous! See also Drugs.

Added by Tim on August 17, 2009| Comment | You Like This |

Funny T-Shirts

17. I'm on a Pussy Hunt!

Even today it shocks. Signature male white trash t-shirt/ballcap impression. Do they still sell these?

Added by Tim on August 12, 2009| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Things

18. Columbus Day

First, he didn't discover shit. He did enslave, torture, and murder native Caribbeans to extinction. He was even up on charges for being too harsh, and for the Spanish, that's saying a lot. He bounced around, often getting lost, under constant threat of mutiny. Let's have a federal holiday! See also Holidays.

Added by Tim on August 12, 2009| 1 Comment | You Like This |

Funny People

19. The Guy Who Gave You Shit in High School

It is ten years later, and there he is as you roll up in your car- at the pay window of a fast food place. He sees you, you see him. He gives you your food, and your change, and who's laughing now, Champ?

Added by Tim on August 11, 2009| Comment | You Like This |

Funny Things to Do

20. Smoking While Shaving

See also Bathroom, Tobacco.

Added by Tim on August 11, 2009| Comment | You Like This |

Tim

79 Entries
117 Comments

Grew up in a small town in Wisconsin, now live in Arizona. Enjoy married life, reading history books, hiking, Stephanie Miller Show, German language, blackjack, and my two dogs. Veteran. Can drive stick.

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