Bits of poo still stuck to an animal's butt fur. Butt fur. See also Scatological.
When some guy tries to get in my grill, maybe calling me a stupid name. This is what I call him. Quietly.
Bulletin: You're getting govt. health care now. Oh, and MedicAid. And disability benefits. All of it, every penny, financed by me. Money I could really use. Another thing, while ranting, fascist or communist? Make up your minds. See also Elderly.
For children. Inside a metal lunch box. Didn't matter if it was Barbie, Hong Kong Fooey, or Hot Wheels; the Thermos bottle had a glass lining. The lining would last approximately two days, if it didn't in fact break on the way to school. I remember actually pursing my lips and actually drinking my milk through the glass. It took the lunchbox people around eight years or so figure out that it was a bad idea. See also 70's, Children, Schools.
...and you can't get it out. So you jump up, slap and push on your chest and stomach, swear like a sailor, and then sort of finally lean forward and shake your shirt. Riotous! See also Drugs.
Even today it shocks. Signature male white trash t-shirt/ballcap impression. Do they still sell these?
10. Columbus Day
First, he didn't discover shit. He did enslave, torture, and murder native Caribbeans to extinction. He was even up on charges for being too harsh, and for the Spanish, that's saying a lot. He bounced around, often getting lost, under constant threat of mutiny. Let's have a federal holiday! See also Holidays.