MsKnowItAll's Entries
Funny Phrases
71. Reaching For The Brass Ring
In the early days of amusement park carousels, kids riding a circling wooden horse up & down, were encouraged to lean WAAAAYYYY out to grab a brass ring hanging out of a wall dispenser. Redeemed for a ticket, the next ride was FREE. It was a prize if you took and won the risk. Dangerous but VERY popular. See also Old-Timey.
Funny Songs
72. I Know ALL the Hits of the 1600s!
I sing at Renaissance Festivals and it's a finite set. Once you learn them, there are no new songs. (Well, I do throw in Moody Blues, Jethro Tull and Rush but only in a madrigal way) And I really get down with Shakespeare tunes!
Funny Tattoos
73. If You Can Read This There Better be an Engagement Ring in Your Pocket!
Roz, on the sitcom Night Court, mentioned this was her only tattoo, somewhere on her butt cheek. Still makes me giggle... See also 80's, Sitcom.
Funny Books
74. The Book of Hand Shadows to be Thrown Upon The Wall
That's a lot of fun to throw a book, but where do the hand shadows come in?
Funny Books
75. 100 Step by Step Napkin Folds
This is for someone with A LOT of time on their hands for trivial decorations. Obviously, after planning meals, shopping for food, preparation and clean up . . . you also have to make the napkins look presentable. Is this before or after you chew food for everyone?
Funny Observations
76. There Aren't Enough Past Lives to Go Around . . .
At no other time has there been this many people on this planet. Not only can there not be more than one Napoleon or Cleopatra, no body ever claims they were an obscure peasant who died young. Sorry, just not enough ancestors . . .
Funny Observations
77. There is One Love for Each Person. FALSE!
There are PLENTY of soul mates! Do you really think there's only one person in the world for you? Can you really find ONE true love in 7+ billion people? That's just setting yourself up for failure. There is A LOT of love out there, but you gotta go find it!
Funny Observations
78. It is NOT an ORAL Exam
The only one who gives you an oral exam is a dentist. What you take as a school test is a VERBAL exam.
Funny Observations
79. Las Vegas NV Billboard: Too Many Pedestrians Die on Our Roads
Okay, so we're over the limit. What is the correct number?
Funny Advice
80. Before You Launch Yourself into the Air, Have a Place to Land
This is the rule for the airplanes, it should apply to everything you do: don't take off 'til you have a place to land. Watching blooper videos shows people can become airborne but not having a plan costs them injury and/or loss of something important.
