Simple. Boring. Bland. Just like your entire life, you striped-shirt-wearing douchebag. See also Alcohol.
I mixture of milk and root beer. It's actually pretty good but remember to put the milk in first because otherwise it curdles.
Psst. Got something funnier? Add your own funny drink.
I enjoy the assumptions that 1) Welch's produces a noteworthy grape and 2) a Welch's grape improves the taste of a soda that doesn't actually contain any grapes.
If you believe high school baseball coaches from the 40's, it prevents cramps.