Funny Quotes

291. “The kid is not my son.”

―Michael Jackson

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Funny Things

292. Burger King Cup on the Ground Behind a Wendy’s

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Funny Foods

293. Oatmeal Made with Oat Milk

The vegan equivalent of cooking a calf in its mother’s milk.

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Funny Insults

294. You Look Like You’d Bring 18 People to an 18+ Movie

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Funny Observations

295. You Would Get in the Ocean if There Was a Dead Body Floating out There Somewhere, but You Wouldn’t Dare Get in a Pool with a Corpse

Ratios and expectations.

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Funny Phrases

296. Liar, Liar, Pants Expired

It would suck to have expired pants.

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Funny Instruments

297. Serpent

An instrument from the renaissance period.

“What the devil is that!?”
― Mendelssohn, upon hearing a serpent.

(He would go on to use the instrument in many compositions.) See also Snakes.

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Funny Observations

298. Yogurt: It’s like swallowing a dead rat. Whole.

See also Dairy.

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Funny Books

299. The Adventures of Side Characters

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Funny Places

300. Ø, Jutland, Denmark

Its just a single letter…

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