Funny Things to Do

271. Falling in a Muddy River, Taking Your Socks off to Dry, Getting a Splinter from Walking Barefoot, and then Having to Walk a Mile Back to Your Car in Wet Socks

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Funny Books

272. Harry Potter and the Normal Year of School

Harry needs a year without drama. See also Harry Potter, Made Up.

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Funny Insults

273. You Look Like You Go to Bed Without Showering After Working Out

See also Exercise, Hygiene.

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Funny Insults

274. You Look Like You Steal Babies and Turn Them into Goblins at the Center of a Maze

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Funny Insults

275. You Look Like You Jump into Your Pants to Put Them on

See also Pants.

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Funny Observations

276. Every Bookmark That Costs More Than a Dollar is a Waste of Money—Just Use the Dollar

See also Books.

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Funny Anti-Jokes

277. What’s Red and Not There?

No strawberries.

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Funny Jobs

278. The Two Men Who Carry a Pane of Glass Everywhere

They are in at least one episode of every slapstick cartoon. See also Cartoons, Old-Timey.

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Funny Observations

279. The Fastest Elevators Are the Broken Ones

Assuming that you want to go down. See also Dark.

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Funny Sayings

280. I Used to Play Piano by Ear, But Now I Use My Hands

See also Music.

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