Funny Things to Do

811. Bending a Ruler Until It Breaks

Don’t let the teacher catch you. Also, don’t try this at home. See also Schools.

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Funny Books

812. Learning to Play With a Lion’s Testicles Shop

Unexpected gifts from the animals of Africa.

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Funny Insults

813. I Hope Your Wife Gives Birth to a Centipede So You Spend the Rest of Your Life Slaving Away to Buy Shoes for It

See also Insects, Shoes.

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Funny Observations

814. I’m Not Coming to the Party, but I Still Want to be Invited

See also Party.

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Funny Things

815. Helicopter Ejector Seats

See also Useless.

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Funny Advice

816. When Using a Public Bathroom, Always Check to See if There’s Toilet Paper

Otherwise, you might walk out with one sock. See also Bathroom.

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Funny Sayings

817. You Bet Your Bottom Dollar!

See also Old-Timey.

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Funny Euphemisms

818. Food Trident

Also known as a fork. See also Cutlery.

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Funny Advice

819. If Someone Insults You, Say “Exactly” and Confuse Them

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Funny Euphemisms

820. Screaming Hamster Back From the Dead and it Poops On Your Eye

Sorry, I meant a sixth grader playing the kantele.

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