Funny Advice

1951. Always remember, you can teach a man to fish, but you can't climb a ladder with a bell in each hand.

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Funny Observations

1952. Water Isn't Wet

Technically, being wet means being covered or saturated with water or another liquid, so water isn't wet, it is the wetness. See also Science.

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Funny Questions

1953. What Does Many Mean?

Thanks for telling me the meaning of many—it means a lot.

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Funny Insults

1954. "She is spherical, like a globe. I could find out countries in her."

Shakespeare for the win! See also Shakespeare.

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Funny Quotes

1955. "I'm not a pee wizard. I can't predict pee."

Me, when my girlfriend complained that she needed to go to the bathroom right after I called her. See also Bathroom, Magic.

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Funny Sayings

1956. All Poopoo Times Are Peepee Times but Not All Peepee Times Are Poopoo Times

See also Bathroom, Scatalogical.

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Funny Insults

1957. You Played Me Like a Fiddle

No, fiddles are actually hard to play. I played you like the cheap kazoo you are.

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Funny Euphemisms

1958. Cursed Ravioli

Also known as Smuckers Uncrustables.

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Funny Observations

1959. The Average Number of Skeletons Inside the Human Body is Greater than One

It sounds creepy until you realize that the major contributor to that statistic is pregnancy.

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Funny Observations

1960. “I will be contacting my lawyer” is the adult version of “I'm telling my mom.”

Makes you think of Trump, doesn’t it? See also Lawyers.

Added by a Guest on May 1, 2020| 7 Comments | 106 people like this You Like This | Unlike